Who am I?

Are we losing ourselves? What does it mean to truly be me? Who am I?

I read in the book the “Screwtape Letters” that God asks us for everything: our desires, hopes, thoughts, and will to him. He then gives it all back to us and makes us more ourselves than we have ever been.

So do we lose ourselves somewhere in the mix? Do we make charades of ourselves and live in the land of the glass menagire?

It seems in the course of life that we do give ourselves away. In some areas we become slaves to our desires: “I’m going to follow my desires and my feelings because that is what’s most important to me right now.” Sometimes we follow our natural sinful desires becuase that is what is suitable to the moment not necessarily congruent to our character, however after repeatedly following this the whim of the moment becomes our character.

 In other ways we perform elaborate acts to fool the particular crowd we’re with. When we’re in church we act sanctius because that’s what we think others want to see. With a girlfriend we act strong and brave; however we think they want us to be like. With bosses and those above us we act like we’re sucessful even if the pressure is cutting at our lives.

 So in all of this where is room for me? There are so many people out there in the world living lives not their own. They are emotionally unsatisfied and empty: the broken, the down. In a way we are all like this. All of us have in some way taken on personas not of our own character.

Mostly it is becuase we live in a world of sin. Our true personality was perfect in God but the enterance of sin brought corruption to the point of changing who we even are.

 However there is hope. God tells us who we are: sons of the living God master of the universe. To God I’ve got to give it all. All of the things in my life which I’m holding back need to be offered up to him. My time, money, energy, ambitions, relationships, all of it must go. It’s then that he gives it all back transformed to a new me.

Through Christ I am able to learn who I am. Here is where fufilling satisfaction lies. Here begins the firm foundations of my life. In him I can rest knowing that he sees down to my inner being and knows me fully. There is no acting, no false faces, just me and God.

Living in the Present

You know I read something interesting today by C.S. Lewis in his book The Screwtape Letters. It said that one of our greatest vices is being stuck in a time which is not in reality. Many people brood over a troublesome past or can’t get past regrets or failures which can never be changed. Others are set on the future filled with anxieties and worries about things that haven’t happened yet. The book says that both of these mindsets are not solid. The best thing we can do is live in the present. 

 Reality and eternity are rooted in the present. Freedom of choice and seeing things as they occur are the closest we are to reality. The past is unlike reality in that it is unchangeable. What’s done is done. The least like reality and eternity is the future. These things haven’t even happened and are simply imagined. It is a complete fabrication of the mind and therefore the least real. The past at least existed.

As the book says the enemy would keep us in either the regretful past or worried over the imaginary future. It is the least connected to God we could be. Instead we should try to live our lives in the present.  It is where God can use us and affect our lives. It is where all events occur. It is the small daily living which creates us. We need to focus on daily grace and daily provision. It is our daily actions and our daily salvation which gives us true life in Christ. 

We can forget about all our past sins with our present forgiveness in Christ. We can rest in the provision of the future through the present promises of Christ. So in everything we do let us live in the present. Let us live in the actions of right now and let us learn just to focus those actions on the Lord.  

Photoshop

 

I just wanted to post something I learned using photoshop. I call it iSkate.

George Washington University

 ”Read, every day, something no one else is reading. Think, every day, something no one else is thinking. Do, every day, something no one else would be silly enough to do. It is bad for the mind to continually be part of unanimity.” This quote by Christopher Morley has been my inspiration and my motivation. Ever since I was a little boy I have always sought to do things which set me apart. Whether it was going the extra mile on a project or helping out at church I have continually been involved a wide variety of things. This desire for the unique and different is what probably most contributed to my love for foreign affairs.
 I can remember beginning Spanish class in middle school and being utterly enthralled by the rich culture and fascinating language. My interest soon spread to other areas of the world and I even began following foreign policy on the news. As I learned about people groups and places my eye settled on one area in particular: the Middle East. The diverse and historical origins of these unique people became my main focus in international affairs. Soon my bookshelves filled with titles such as Understanding Islam and The Arabs: Journeys Beyond the Mirage. It was from these strands which tied my dream of one day working for the Central Intelligence Agency. 
 I hope to join the CIA as a specialist in the Middle Eastern because want to bring change. In my personal studies I have found that Arabs, and specifically those who follow Islam, are among the most misunderstood people in the world. September 11th opened the eyes of many Americans however few actually know much about the Arabs. Many think they are a suicidal group of virulent religious fanatics who abhor America and all those in it. I want to be able to one day impart understanding to my fellow countrymen. I believe as we all know more about each other and see past differences the world will change. I hope to be a contributor to a world of unity and peace that is not beaten by the walls of ignorance. That is my dream in the CIA and that is why I want to go to George Washington.
 I want to get the best education possible so I can be the most able to do the most good. George Washington has a long history of academic excellence but also an equally long history of superior international studies programs. The Elliott School of International Affairs has been ranked one of the best in the nation. With the tools and skills I will get from George Washington I will be able to go forth and live out my drive and my passion. Most importantly though, I will be able to make a difference in the world in which we live. If peace begins in the individual, then let that individual be me and let it begin at George Washington.